Back to School Guide
A Message from Our Founders
Hi there,
We're Jess and Amanda — sisters, co-founders of Jam, and, most importantly, working moms with six kids between us, from newborn to teen.
We know firsthand that the back-to-school season doesn't just mean buying fresh pencils and lunchboxes. It means a million forms, juggling shifting schedules, trying to remember which kid needs what (and when), and doing everything you can to avoid dropping the ball.
We created this guide to help lighten that load for Back-to-School and beyond. Not with Pinterest-perfect charts or impossible routines — but with real tools and realistic systems.
You deserve a smoother school year. We hope this guide helps you get there.
Jessica *&** Amanda** · Co-founders of Jam*
The Why
Back-to-school season is supposed to feel like a fresh start — but for most parents, it feels more like a pressure cooker. School forms, supply lists, sign-ups, snack duty, lunch planning, carpools, calendar conflicts… it all adds up fast and comes at us through endless pings of school emails and class WhatsApp threads.
And the truth is, the work isn't evenly distributed. The mental load — remembering, anticipating, planning, and following up — falls disproportionately on women, especially moms.
This guide is here to help fix that. To make the invisible visible, and then share it, systematize it, or even automate it.
Whether you're a first-time kindergartener parent or a seasoned pro with multiple school drop-offs, we've got you. We've broken this guide into manageable sections to help you feel ready — and stay ready — all year long.
You'll find:
- A comprehensive Back-to-School checklist. A mental-load-busting list of all the things that need to get done to get your kids off to school this year, including timeline suggestions and tips, so it can be delegated and shared.
- Targeted conversations to have with your partner and kids before the school year, to reduce mental load and create a healthy organization framework everyone is happy with.
- Systems, tricks and hacks to reduce overwhelm, improve communication and help foster responsibility all year long.
Let's get started. 👇
The Back-to-School Checklist
Everything you need to do — without doing it all alone.
This is your comprehensive list of everything that needs to get done before the school year starts. Review and divvy items up, so it’s not all on one person’s shoulders. The goal doesn’t have to be 50/50 (unless you want it to be); the trick is to find the ratio that works best for your family.
Jam Tip: Start a shared To-Do list in Jam to keep tabs, get reminders and divvy it up with your family — or print our downloadable PDF to keep it straight.
Conversations to Have Before the School Year Starts
That will actually reduce the mental load.
Back-to-school is a natural reset point — not just for routines, but for expectations. In many households, one parent quietly takes on the lion’s share of the logistical planning, scheduling, and task management. (You might be the one holding this guide right now.) But it doesn’t have to be that way.
Before the chaos kicks in, use this time to have some honest, practical conversations — both with your partner and with your kids — to set the tone for a more equitable and less overwhelming school year.
Conversations with Your Partner
Even the most well-intentioned co-parents can fall into default patterns where one person ends up carrying more of the mental load. That’s why it’s worth hitting pause and asking: What’s going to work for both of us this year?
Talk about your rhythms and workloads.
Are we striving for 50/50? Or something else that feels fair based on our work or caregiving responsibilities?
Are there known high-stress periods where one person’s job will require the other to pick up more at home?
How do we want to handle those times — pre-plan? Outsource?
Define how tasks will be divided.
Every family does this differently — and that’s fine — as long as it’s intentional. Some couples use the Fair Play method, where each person owns categories top-to-bottom. Others switch off weekly or handle tasks based on skill or availability.
Do we want to “own” certain categories (e.g. all food, all extracurriculars)?
Would we prefer to rotate responsibilities like pickups, meals, and bedtime?
What worked last year? What didn’t?
Create your master lists.
You can’t divide the work if you don’t know what all the work is. Make the invisible visible. Start by listing:
What needs to get done daily (lunches, homework help, pick-ups)
What needs to get done weekly (laundry, groceries, meal planning)
What shows up monthly (school events, bill payments, appointments)
What’s coming seasonally (birthdays, holidays, travel)
Jam Tip: Create shared to-do lists in Jam organized by frequency (Daily, Weekly, Monthly). Assign tasks and set reminders so things don’t fall through the cracks.
Choose your tracking system.
The system should work for you — not create more work. If one person is mentally holding the whole calendar and task list, that’s not a system — it’s a burden.
Where will the calendar live?
How will tasks get tracked and assigned?
What tool lets both adults see what’s happening without texting or guessing?
Jam Tip: Jam’s shared calendar, auto-forwarding for school schedules, and color-coded to-do lists make it easy to keep everyone in the loop — without micromanaging.
Make recurring tasks automatic.
Once you’ve laid out your systems, automate wherever you can.
Add recurring tasks to your shared to-do lists (e.g., “check folders” every Friday, “stock lunches” every Sunday).
Revisit your systems once a month to make sure they’re still working.
Don’t forget one-off seasonal items.
Consider what you can outsource.
Sharing the load doesn’t always mean splitting it 50/50 — it might mean removing it entirely from your plates. You don’t need a nanny or personal assistant to lighten the lift. Start small:
Task-based support (like Tula, Sundays)
Meal prep or delivery services
Auto-ship for essentials (pantry, cleaning, pet supplies, vitamins)
Driving services (like HopSkipDrive) for after-school logistics
Conversations with Your Kids
Kids can help share in family tasks, which builds responsibility and helps them see themselves as part of the family team. Having a “family meeting” ahead of the school year can help smooth friction and get everyone working together.
Set expectations for mornings, afternoons, and evenings.
Depending on your child’s age, this can range from brushing teeth and getting dressed to making their bed, feeding the dog, or packing their backpack.
For younger kids (nursery, preschool):
Brush teeth
Get dressed
Eat breakfast
For elementary and middle schoolers:
Make bed
Take vitamins
Pack lunch/snack
Unpack lunchbox and homework
Tidy up or help with chores
Jam Tip: Use recurring checklists in Jam for each child. You can customize them by day and let kids check off tasks themselves (hello, independence).
Talk about how they can contribute.
Start a conversation about how the family works best when everyone pitches in — not just Mom or Dad. Ask: What are chores and responsibilities they could take on this year? Then discuss:
How can they be responsible in communicating with you about school needs this year (i.e. projects, spirit days) so everyone can be prepared?
When should their tasks/chores be done?
What system you’ll use so everyone can see what’s going on and what they need to do.
Having kids chip in may mean tasks take longer in the beginning — but the long-term payoff is ultimately less work, more confidence, and better habits for everyone.
Creating Systems That Stick
Because winging it isn’t working anymore.
To actually reduce your mental load for the school year, you need systems — realistic ones that run in the background so you’re not managing it all daily.